As February comes to an end and I have nothing to say about the Olympics, I must revisit some of my own thoughts of love as the light of sitcoms shine into my heart.
Ahhh, love. All I have to say to that is BLERGHHH! No, I’m not some spinster living in an upstairs apartment with two cats and a pint of homemade triple fudge brownie ice cream in the freezer. I’m a married woman living in an upstairs apartment with two cats and a pint of homemade triple fudge brownie ice cream in the freezer. I’m not put off by love. I love my hubby. But I frustrate him every year with my vitriol against the Hallmark sponsored day of red and pink. He wants to do nice things for me, but I completely rebuff every flower, every chocolate and ever traditional valentiney thing that he would try to do. This year, though, the lead up to Valentine’s Day was paved with comedic gold with Valentine themed or tinged episodes of my favourite comedies. Will the lessons learned soothe the heart of this savage anti-valentiner?
Modern Family – My Funky Valentine
After years of celebrating Valentine’s day the same way (card exchange, kiss, dinner at a family style Italian eatery), the Dunphys decide to spice up their love life with a little role playing and a room at a nice hotel. Jay takes Gloria to see a comedian with disastrous effects and Mitchell and Cameron head to a ice cream eatery to help Manny make a love connection.
When Dylan brings Haley a life size painting (from a photo with a paint program printed on large canvas) of them together, Phil realizes he got outshone by a high schooler. So he conspires with his wife to set up a date at a hotel, complete with role playing. With a few false starts, Phil says the right thing to get Claire going. She excuses herself and comes back in just a coat. Then things start going wrong. Her belt gets caught in the escalator and everyone they know, neighbors, teachers, co-workers and eventually her father and stepmother, see them in their predicament. It is with Gloria’s help that Claire is finally helped out of the situation, switching coats without revealing skin and leaving the discarded coat on the escalator.
Lesson Learned by this Anti-Valentiner: Don’t buy coats with attached belts.
Jay and Gloria were in the hotel to see a comedian, whom Gloria did not want to see, but she had to admit that the comedian was funny… Until he turned his jokes on Jay’s age versus his wife’s obvious youth and beauty. Jay’s insecurities bubble to the surface and Gloria quickly reassures him that she will always love him, just like he will love her if she gets fat. She does promise to get fat when Jay pauses before agreeing that he would still love her but also points out that he has to get old, but she doesn’t have to get fat.
Lesson Learned by this Anti-Valentiner: Be prepared, if you are older than your younger, beautiful spouse, to be ridiculed for it and have to prove over and over again that you really do, actually love each other.
Manny is hit by heartache again when a big bully in class steals Manny’s love poem to a girl and says it’s his own. Enter uncles Mitchell and Cameron, who, despite Mitchell’s disappointment with how a case went and his Valentiney Scrooginess (I like it!), help Manny try to win the girl. Mitchell gets to give his speech after all to a confused restaurant audience, but it makes his (and Cameron’s) Valentine Day more awesome. Manny, on the other hand, loses the girl because the bully guy really did like her and young girls are crazy. I would pick Manny in a heartbeat if I were 50 years younger! (that’s how old I feel today).
Lesson Learned by this Anti-Valentiner: Young girls are crazy. Oh, who am I kidding? I already knew that. No, the lesson learned is that sometimes, you gotta let the anti-valentiner get it off their chest.
